Thursday, March 3, 2011

Odd Habits

1. Whenever I go into an establishment and order a sandwich, I pretend that I want everything on my sandwich and then scrape it off when I get it just so the person at the counter doesn't judge me for going all the way to a restaurant to just order a plain turkey-and-bread sandwich.

2. I never, ever eat left-overs unless they have been prepared for me by my grandmother. No exceptions.

3. I eat nothing on my hamburgers except ketchup. Sometimes I even leave off the meat patty.

4. My happy place is in Hogwarts castle.

5. I often daydream about what it would be like if Spock was an actual person.

6. I love to pop zits. Those that belong to myself and others.

7. I wipe my boogers on my husband's pillow. Then I switch pillows with him because I feel bad. Eventually, both of our pillows are wrought with snot. He is completely unaware of this.

8. I re-read the same books over and over again until I have them memorized.

9. Despite the state of mine and my husband's pillows, I am a germophobe beyond psychiatric help. I wash my hands every half hour at work.

10. I refuse to share milk products with anyone.

11. I am twenty-one years old and I still do not step on cracks. My mother is very appreciative, she just doesn't know it.

12. I hate carrying a purse. They're nasty, germ-ridden things and I refuse to deal with keeping up with one despite the social norms that pressure me to do so.

13. I lose everything.

14. I clip my husband's toenails and pluck his eyebrows.

15. I judge people by their poor spelling skills.

16. When a library patron is angry at me over something stupid, I imagine them being attacked by a horde of zombies like in Left 4 Dead.

17. I am obsessed with selling fake, computer-generated items in a fake, computer-generated auction house in a fake, computer-generated world.

18. Everytime I hear the name Justin Beiber, I imagine a beaver with really great hair gnawing on a piece of wood and building a dam.

19. I hate watching/hearing people sing. I'm cool with it on the radio and in songs and stuff, but I hate being in person and watching a person sing. I always feel embarrassed for them and I am not sure why.

20. I hate, hate, hate stop sign intersections. Every time I approach one, I imagine the possibility of being crushed to death inside of my vehicle.

1 comment:

  1. I am a horrible speller, it's not my fault- it's genetic. Give me a second chance! love you.